Why do we tend to hold out breaths and not breathe especially in times of crisis or stress? The first thing that we stop doing when we are in a heated debate is to stop breathing and allow our blood pressure to rise.
Have you ever noticed that when you are really angry or scared that you get emotional and stop really breathing? Obviously your heart is still beating and you're grasping air but, you aren’t breathing deeply. If you were it would give you time to think.
If you think about it taking a deep breathe takes some concentration. When you take a deep breathe you feel your stomach expand and sense of calm comes over you. At least this is what happens to me when I take a really deep breath and breathe. It is a sense of letting go, you let all of the anger and stresses disappear when you breathe.
I have found myself in heated debates and feel completely exhausted after, it is mentally draining. Afterwards all I want to do is lye down and breathe, take a time out. My quiet time!
In fact the other day I wasn’t in a heated debate I was just trying to get my children out of the house and to church on time. My daughter was getting Confirmed and it was a big deal for her a “special” day! Well, of course did her lovely brothers care? Not so much. They put up a fight to get ready! I had their clothing laid out and ready for them to put on and if they could follow the little guidance I had for them, it could be easy! But was it, NO! They insisted on fighting me and fighting with each other.
The hour it took to get them out the door seemed like hours. (By the way, I find it so interesting that I as a Mother find it so important that my children look nice at church and it takes so much effort and takes me to place that I have to admit my behavior would not be that Christian. Unless, you call screaming at your children and cursing all the way to Church Christian? LOL)
By the time I arrive at church and have said my pleasantries to my friends I go to sit in the pew and something comes over me. Oh my, I haven’t stopped to breathe! I had this feeling come over me that I needed to stop and take a deep breath! Phew, I sat in the pew with one son on either side and finally I took the time to really relax!
Fortunately, for me Church is where I find my solace and ability to relax and reflect. I need to stop and breathe more often it really helps in my daily stress. Some find time to meditate which is something I long to do but, I find that when I sit and try and have no thoughts at all is the time that the thoughts don’t stop. My brain doesn’t stop and quiet, all I think about is what I should be doing, then I think how much longer can I sit here doing absolutely nothing when down in my basement the dryer is calling me to fold the laundry or from the kitchen I hear the dishes calling to be cleaned.
I have goals to quiet myself and breathe but, for now at least I can see that I need to breathe and relax. Church works for me and I know yoga studios and other institutions work for others. I know this for sure sitting and breathing works and taking the time to breathe is free and beneficial on so many levels.
As the old saying goes, “take time to smell the roses”, life is short and taking the beneficial time you need to stop and breathe…sometimes even while looking at a beautiful flower is all we need. Take care of you, you are all you have! The rest is the icing.