Be Yourself

For those of you that read my blog weekly, I am sorry that I missed last week. I have been working on getting my recovery coaching certification, and the big test was last Friday! Phew, I am happy to check that off my list. I decided back in June that I wanted to share my experience, strength and hope on a professional level. Today, I am happy to say that I am affiliated with Adolescent Advocates and I am very excited about my newest endeavor. Given that I am still here to Blog!!!! 

So why do we care what others think? When I was growing up, the neighbors opinion of me was just as important, if not more important, than my opinion of myself. I was taught that I should dress like everyone else, have the same religious beliefs as everyone else and make decisions knowing that the neighbors would approve! A strangers’ assessment of me warranted a deeper impression than my own judgement of myself. I feel that this is where insecurity begins in oneself; when others’ feelings trump our own. 

This happened on the Radnor trail this week. I was doing my daily walk/run with my dog. I had my earbuds in and was listening loudly to one of my favorite tunes and I was singing! I had strange looks from the people walking past and all I could see was judgement. “Is that lady crazy? Is she really singing?” Well, I felt really good, the sky was blue and no clouds on the horizon. The temperature was a crisp 65* and it was euphoric!!! Nothing beats a great run/walk!!! Gratitude was pouring out of me and the excitement obvious. Why then did I second guess myself in terms of the singing??? I am definitely not Patti LaBelle and yes, it might be better in the shower. I just had a feeling and had to run with it (no pun)!!! It felt AWESOME!!!

I don’t want my children to second guess themselves. Especially when wanting to express their ideas and point of views. In fact I encourage it! I have said to them since they were little that they are leaders and not followers! Have your own take on things; if someone feels differently that is OK. Everyone has a right to their own opinion and please don’t do something because someone else wants you to do it. That is unless you agree. 

People in my opinion need to be individuals. Everyone thinking the same, looking the same and acting the same is very BORING!!! Life is for living and expressing ourselves. Each person is born with a gift and sometimes that gift is not so socially acceptable but that is OK!!! Can you imagine if Charlie Chaplin lived here in this town!! He would be ridiculed and teased to no end! Why? Because people that are different are scary. Difference is threatening. Strangers bring out very unpleasant feelings. Instead of embracing the diversity and learning something new, we judge and runway in fear!

Fear trumps everything! It is a emotion that we are taught when we are young. I do not believe we come out of the womb riddled with fear, we are taught it at a very young age. In fact, I remember doing it to my own children.When they take their first step and you get up and say watch out!!! Be careful!! You could get hurt!!! Was that really necessary? I knew I was there if they did fall, and if they were in pain it wouldn’t last forever. But, there I was showing them FEAR!!!

Where I wanted to go with this piece is that we should all be who we are and does it really matter what everyone else thinks? A long time ago I learned an amazing phrase, “What others think about you is none of your business”. I love that!!! It really isn’t my business. Hey, we all have some form of judgement in us but, let everyone be who they want to be! Unless they are hurting someone, let it go!!! Keep singing and dancing out loud!!! Especially because, for me, it makes life a lot more happy!!! 

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